Sex and the Superyacht II: The Cover-Up

29 August 2008 By Lisa Hoogerwerf Knapp

A few weeks ago, kicked off a series called "Sex and the Superyacht" with a steamy feature story by contributor Lisa H. Knapp.

Now, continues its series: What do you do when the owner asks you to cover up his extramarital affairs? Keep reading to find out...


Crew are not the only ones having super sex on the superyacht. The owners and guests are, too.

At times it gets a little hairy for crew if they're asked to cover up for infidelity and inappropriate behavior from the yacht owner. Sometimes straddling the line between professionalism, loyalty and doing what comes naturally is a difficult thing to accomplish.

But as the saying goes, "When you're on a yacht, ship happens." The following are true tales, but the names have been changed to protect the guilty.

Capt. Bill looked forward to private time with the owner of the yacht under his command. A nice restaurant provided quality time to talk about the boat and his career. However, food was only an appetizer for their evening’s menu.

“It’s a difficult situation,” says Capt. Bill. “You finally get time with the owner, go to dinner, and somehow that turns into a nightclub. Sometimes the owner wants professional five star service and then, and other times, you have to know when to blend.

“When the owner’s wife would leave, he’d say, ‘Let’s go to the strip club.’ I felt like I had to go and you can’t really say no. So, you’re out drinking until four a.m. and up again at eight. When the owner woke up, I said, ‘Would you like a croissant?’ He answers, ‘Have you washed your hands yet?’”

What’s more trying is covering the owner’s back or backside, as the case may be. Capt. Bill and his crew were the keepers of many secrets about sex on their superyacht.

“The owner introduces me to his girlfriend and then they both leave,” says Capt. Bill. “Then his wife came on board with his son. Then the owner came back while his girlfriend stared at the yacht for four hours while drinking heavily in the restaurant bar. I had to discreetly tell her that he [the owner] was gone for the weekend. When the owner came back with the wife, they missed his girlfriend by two minutes in the marina’s parking lot.”

It was the most stressful day for Capt. Bill, who says he would rather be adrift in a lifeboat at sea than deal with the secrets of sex on the superyacht.

Capt. Sam used to cover for his owner, Mr. Howell, all the time in front of his wife, whom Howell nicknamed “Pesky Pam.” Pam was always happy when Hubby Howell had Sam accompany him on excursions ashore.

“I was nineteen and running this sixty-five Chris Craft from the Broadwater Beach Marina in Biloxi to Point Clear, Alabama, to Houston, Texas. Howell was an oil baron and loaded with dough. I looked innocent and when Ms. Pesky Pam asked me questions, I had to lie about what we did.”

Howell and Capt. Sam were in his limo enroute to the Crystal Pistol in Houston, a strip club, when Howell pulled two cigar boxes from underneath the seat.

“It’s walking around money,” Howell said to Capt. Sam as he gazed at the wads of banded bills in the cigar box.

Walking around money was to be spent while seated -- for a lap dance at the Pistol.

Capt. Sam had to cover for Howell on board, too, whenever he’d bring back a gal he’d picked up with his walking around money.

“That’s how he met Pesky Pam,” Capt. Sam says.

She was one of his conquests during his previous marriage. Or, maybe, he was her conquest.

Capt. Bill remembers the high stress level of a charter guest who was having his “last hurrah” before a stint at the Betty Ford Clinic. He arrived with girlfriend #1 in tow, who was miffed when three other women later arrived.

“It went from zero to sixty in three minutes,” says Capt. Bill.

The girls got friendly with the crew and wanted them to get involved in the action.

“I told the mate to get girl number one off my back because she was hot for me. Then the mate hooked up with her and everyone watched the day head window steam up. Guests are in another world on the yacht. Then the other three girls wound up in a catfight. When I told them to kiss and make up, well, that’s just what happened. Then the stew wound up in bed with the girls; the chef saw them, and it was three seconds away from a full-blown orgy. These are the things that happen on some charters.”

This captain later got crew T-shirts customized with the message, “July 10, 2005: The charter that never happened.”

So, what would you do if you had to take the owner to the strip club or join the party on the gangplank?