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Botox or Not?
Posted: Monday, June 15, 2009 3:52 PM
As I eek ever closer to my 40th birthday, I find myself perpetually humming lyrics from an Annie Lennox song to myself… “Keep young and beautiful; it’s your duty to be beautiful. Keep young and beautiful if you want to be loved.”


Am I the only one who has considered Botox to keep my employers and co-workers from thinking I am getting too old to work in this industry?

Posted: Monday, June 15, 2009 8:19 PM
Trust me, you aren't the only's an industry that celebrates youth and beauty. That's just the reality of it. If you are too old, and appear past the "use-by" date, then you will be replaced for a younger model, even though you may have tons of experience! It is illegal in the rest of the world to put your DOB on the cv, and for yachts, we put it at the top!! That tells all. If you can still physically handle it, and are afraid that you may be looking a bit, well...tired...then go for it. It's not something you need to share with anyone else, that's for sure! (keep it as your dirty little secret)
Posted: Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:27 PM
Joined: 29/10/2008
Posts: 7

Well "anonymous", that's a pathetic reply!!!

If the Owners/Captain are that SHALLOW, and start thinking that their crew are starting to LOOK too old, and past their "sell by date", then they are not worth working for!!! Young "looking" crew "may" look better, BUT, they won't have the experience the older crew have to make sure that all guests have a fabulous time whilst onboard..

Sometimes I think this industry is really not worth many people have their heads up their own a***s!!!

If they cant see past your looks, and recognise your valuability as a crew member..... are they really worth working your socks off for?????

Posted: Tuesday, June 16, 2009 6:28 PM
John-chef, you are absolutely correct that these people are shallow. However, as a male in yachting you may or may not have noticed that there are a lot more older males in the industry who have worked their way up through the ranks of either deck, engineering or as chefs. How many chief stewardesses have you come across that are over 40, or over 50 for that matter? ALL of the captains that I have worked for fall into that age category, but NONE of the women do. And trust me, not all women are interested in quitting to start families. However, unless you are working on a yacht as a purser or chief stewardess with your husband, (the captain), there are very few women in that age category. Have you thought about that during your tirade? The original poster was simply wanting opinions whether it was a bad thing to be considering botox to be more competitive. We are all entitled to our own opinions. If youth or the appearance of youth was not such a desirable trait for women, then why are there so many products such as hair dye to cover up those little signs of aging?? It is distinguished for a MAN to have gray hair- it makes him look experienced and knowledgeable. Unfortunately, for us women, it just makes us look OLD. If she feels like she is going to lose her edge or her job because of a couple of lines, then why not do something about it?
Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 12:28 AM
Do you really think that how many wrinkles you have is going to determine whether or not you get or keep your job? I know this industry can be shallow, I don't think it's THAT shallow. Plus, I don't think botox is the answer. It's rat poison or something like that. I think wrinkles look more natural than botox brow. Have you looked at Nancy Pelosi? Scary looking.
Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 9:50 AM
Joined: 29/10/2008
Posts: 7

What i'm trying to get across is....If the Owners/Captains would rather have a pretty face to look at, rather than an experienced crew member, then they not worth working for!!

At the end of the day, the guests are the most important, and a Captain should always have the most experienced crew onboard to make sure it happens...

Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 2:05 PM
Joined: 21/08/2008
Posts: 30

Pricipals don't pay the bills. No one in their right mind is going to walk away from a job because they suspet that the owner puts too much emphasis on the crew's looks. Yachting is like show business.  I don't think there are many female crew members who do not worry about extra pounds or wrinkles one day costing them their job and there are likely male crew who have the same concerns. If botox will really make you look thirty until you are fifty, then I'd say go for it if you think you will want to work that long in this business.

Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 8:39 PM
Joined: 27/01/2009
Posts: 8

As an Owner/Captain and as a regular charter customer, (and male for full disclosure), I can say that looks are very important. Now before you go bashing me, let me finish - The "look" I am referencing is the look of a person who cares about themself, enjoys life, and enjoys others. Notice I did not say "Youth". I know female staff who are in their early 60's who look fantastic! They have smiles, look refreshed, and make veryone around them feel like it is a great day. At the same time I have seen 20 year olds who look like they party all night and could care less about being where they are. Which would you rather be around?? Now having said this, it is true that the first level of importance is doing the job right. But a person who does an okay job, but makes everyone feel great to be on a charter may be a better candidate than a person who does a great job but makes everyone think they have had a bad day. Image is very important! Being 40 is not old. In fact it is quite young! There is nothing wrong with using botox if it will make YOU feel better. If you feel better about yourself, others will feel better about you as well. However, don't get botox thinking it will magically extend your carreer. Just my thoughts from the Pacificside of the USA
Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 9:18 PM
As a woman in the industry, I say do it. But do it for you. In the industry or out of the industry it doesn't matter, most women are concerned about their looks. And if there is a little something that you can do and afford to make yourself look a little better, by all means what are you waiting for? Some Man chef to try to figure it out?
Posted: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 9:41 PM

DONT DO IT!  Our chief stew just came back from her holiday with a mysterious bruise on her forehead and she looks ridiculous! Her eyes are slanting in a different direction and her smile doesnt look genuine anymore! Isn't a genuine smile one of the best weapons in this industry! Instead of resorting to injecting poison into your head, why not re-assess your life style choices? We have a stew who is over 40 who looks fantastic and completely natural, she sticks to a healthy diet, exercises and doesn't drink her body weight in wine each night!

Botox is just a slippery slope into poor body image, you have to get it redone every few months and as it hasnt been a mainstream option for many years, nobody yet knows what the long term effects of injecting poison into your face are!

I agreewith Tpeterson, its all about personal presentation, not how many lines you have on your face!

Posted: Thursday, June 18, 2009 9:40 AM
Joined: 29/10/2008
Posts: 7

Well AT LAST... two people who have common sense...:T.Petersen & Anonymous....

I guess the other "anonymous" couldn't comprehend ( understand- if you don't know what that means)....what I was trying to get across...

Oh, and put your names on your reply's, why do people always hide behind the "anonymous"...!!

Posted: Thursday, June 18, 2009 10:24 PM
Joined: 20/05/2009
Posts: 1

You have just scared the c..p out of me,  I'm 45 and just taking the plunge ie courses and everything else I can think of.

My advice is Olay, always Olay.  I swear by it.  It's done me good

Crew Confessor
Posted: Wednesday, June 24, 2009 10:40 PM
Joined: 20/11/2008
Posts: 94

Dear Ms. Botox or Not,

You have discovered one of the downsides of an industry that values youth and good looks as highly as the yachting industry does; namely it does not smile kindly upon the effects of age, particularly the effects of age on its female members. The yachting industry isn't alone in this type of discrimination of course, but is getting injected, lifted, sucked out of and augmented the answer?

First the botox. You know of course that botox (botulinum toxin A) is a deadly poison. Remember when your mother told you to never eat anything from a can that has an outward dent? There was a good reason for that. The fatality rate for botulism poisoning was more than 60 percent before effective development of anti toxins, and it wasn't a nice way to die. Victims usually suffocated after their diaphragms became paralyzed.

Botox works by paralyzing the muscles in the area of the injection. It is only supposed to be used for the vertical lines that can occur between the eyes, though many physicians have been using it for forehead lines and for wrinkles in the corners of the eyes. It can't do much for the parentheses around the mouth, they need to be filled in with something like Juvederm, or Restylane.

It is not without risks. Botox can migrate and affect muscles that were not intended causing drooping eyelids, or even a wandering eye. And as you know it's not permanent and will last for just a few months. They have also discovered an unexpected benefit, it seems to have a positive effect on those suffering from migraine headaches, though researchers are not sure why. If I suffered from migraines I'd be getting some botox, wrinkles or not!

If you decide to give it a try make sure you go to a well regarding dermatologist and whatever you do, don't have it done at one of those botox parties. Remember, as in most things, less is more. Nothing wrong with a little freshening up if you think it will make you feel better about yourself and more confident. So much of your appearance comes from the inside.

There are some other things I'd suggest, not just for appearances sake but for better skin health. First, wear your sunscreen! Put it on when you brush your teeth in the morning and reapply several times during the day. Make sure you use one that protects against UVA A and B rays. Many dermatologists recommend the use of topical retinoid cream, like Retin A. It can reduce the development of small fine wrinkles as well as some sun damage. It may even reduce the development of skin cancers though the jury is out on this.

So apart from taking good care of your skin, be careful not to indulge in too much alcohol, get a good amount of sleep (easier said than done on a busy charter yacht I know), and regular exercise.

There are many yachts that seem to have not one crew member over 35, but there are plenty that prefer a more mature crew. So ladies seeking to break into the industry who are "of a certain age," do not lose hope. You may have to direct your efforts to private yachts where often being too "youthful" can be considered a negative. There is age discrimination in this industry and there always will be, and it's not just the women who suffer. There are plenty of older, well experienced male captains who have encountered discrimination in this business but times are changing.

If getting a little extra "help" so that you feel and look your best is what it takes, go for it, but please select well respected doctors and don't go overboard (sorry, couldn't resist). Be healthy, fit, and well groomed with a can do attitude, and there is no reason that you should not be able to find gainful employment in the yachting industry for years to come, if this is what you want to do.

Your Crew Confessor
 Average 4.5 out of 5