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Damaged tender
Anonymous
Posted: Monday, December 1, 2008 1:10 AM
Dear Crew Confessor,

My confession to you. I feel so guilty I have to tell someone but I can't, because then I might lose my job. I used one of the tenders some days ago and I banged it up on the seawall. I'm new on the boat and didn't think anyone would notice, plus on my resume I said i was a very good dinghy man. The next day one of the stewardesses drove tender and when she came back to the boat the mate had a look and saw the damage I had caused and blamed her. He started yelling and she yelled at him (they used to be sleeping partners) and she is fired now. I am feeling badly guilt, even though it turns out she also stolen money, I am still feeling guilty. Should I confess to the Captain that I did the damage, or say nothing?
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, December 4, 2008 5:52 PM
Yes, you should tell the captain what happened because it's about taking responsibility for your actions.  The issue of the money is a separate matter, and her having been "sleeping partners" with the mate are also not part of your issue in this matter.  It may be unpleasant to 1) own up to your mistake and admit openly that even a very good dingy man.  Now that raises the question of having lied/exagerated on your resume about being able to handle dingies well or not.  Could this be why you're afraid of bringing it up to the captain because that would make him aware that he hired you on wrong pretenses?   And if it doesn't seem too important for you and everyone around you to take responsibility for their individual actions, I guess neither is the financial crisis that's being faced globally.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, December 5, 2008 12:04 AM
This is the deckie here. I'd been on the boat such a short time and it took so long to find this job I was afraid to say anything. I know I should do the right thing and tell the truth, but now it's been a few weeks. Might be too late for that. I reckon I'll keep mum and be more careful driving the tender. Can't afford to get sacked from this job. IF the stewie was/got sacked because of the tender damage I would have spoken up, but that wasn't the case. Guilty Dinghy Driver
Anonymous
Posted: Monday, December 8, 2008 9:15 PM

Hi Dinghy dinger. You should definitely fess up, but you can do it in such a way to ease the pain- on both parts. Something like..... Hi Captain and First Officer..... ya know, somethings been kind of on my mind lately and I'm feeling a bit bad about it. Not sure if you fired the stewie for the tender deal or if there was more to it, but I had taken it out  a day or two before and had a bit of a difficult time with it. I may have caused at least some of the damage and I wanted you to know that. I hope this hasn't caused any unnecessary problems. blah, blah, blah.

You may very well get canned for it, but you have to learn to own your mistakes. If you show regret and humbleness (and grovel a bit) you may be lucky enough to keep your job. Chances are you probably would not have been fired if you fessed up in the first place. Lesson learned? Hope so.


Anonymous
Posted: Monday, December 8, 2008 11:09 PM
Hey Dinghy Driver,

You are in a tough situation now... You may have got away with it for now, but what is going to happen when you get found out?  These things tend to have a habit of crawling back out from under the carpet.  You may think you got away with it, but did you really?...

For me, I could accept you made a mistake and caused some damage.  It happens and I am sure you didn't do it deliberately.  But you should have been upfront and told the right people what had happened.  If I found out several weeks after the fact that you bashed the dinghy and then deceived everyone by not owning up to it, then what trust do I have in you now?  How do I know that you are not going to hide screw-ups from us again?   I think the answer here is quite obvious...

Good luck
Crew Confessor
Posted: Tuesday, December 30, 2008 8:21 PM
Joined: 20/11/2008
Posts: 94


Dear Dinghy Dinger, (sorry I know you didn't name yourself this but couldn't resist), You have gotten some excellent advice here! Thanks to all who have chimed in. They don't call me the Crew Confessor for nothing. Hopefully you are still employed and are working your butt off proving your worth as a capable crew member. A New Year is a time when many of us try to start fresh by giving up bad habits or adopting healthier ones. I urge you to begin the New Year with a clear conscience and confess to the captain. Explain that you were new onboard and are deeply regretful for not coming forward sooner. Be VERY humble. The fact is everyone makes mistakes. Hopefully your captain will forgive you for trying to hide yours and you can enter the New Year without this weighing upon you, and vow to own up to your mistakes in the future. Happy New Year, Your Crew Confessor
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 1, 2009 11:38 PM
YOU are off the mark Crew Confessor. Your letting this Doofus Dinghy Dimwit off way too easy. He's a liar and worse, he was willing to let someone else take the blame for his mistake. HE SUX!!!!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 2, 2009 1:56 AM
I say through the deckie to the sharks!
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 2, 2009 1:22 PM

if you fess up, do you think it will change anything? do you think the stew will be re employed?

Its a bit late now - but learn from this mistake!


Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 3, 2009 7:35 AM
Dinghy Man Here, Thanks for all the advice, I am happy to say I am still engaged on the yacht in 2009 and hope all of you can say the same, and if not I hope you soon will be. Seems that my little problem is still atracting attention so an update was in order. The other day the engineer took the dinghy and went in to shore to collect our "charter guests" as I understand is the proper terminology. Guess what? Same thing that happened to me, happened to him. The damage was nearly identical to that which had ocurred a few short weeks ago leading the engineer to literally take the dinghy/tender apart piece by piece to discover the problem. Naturally I was the first to volunteer my assistance. Little did he know that I had a personal interest in learning if my own problem with the dinghy/tender was perhaps not due to my driving skills and maybe something wrong with the vessel itself. Wouldn't you know, some sort of a glitch in the cables resulted in the engines surging forward when they were meant to be in neutral. This resulted in some damage to the tender (again), though thankfully no one was injured as before. My dinghy driving self confidence has been restored. I wish I could be more explicit about what the problem was but to be honest I'm verging on useless with this sort of thing, not much better than the stewies! So relieved to know that my driving skills were not to blame, but I wasn't losing any sleep over it. So, I've not said a word (isn't that what most of you said to do.) I've been working my arse off and the Captain seems to like me. I help out in the galley when I can and also try to help the girls with anything they need. Here's the kicker mates, remember the stew who got fired in the first place? Well the new one they hired fancies me! We've been having a grand old time together! Funny the way things work out. Hint, if you're looking for a private place to shag an empty hot tub is grand, just remember to leave the cover at least partway open or you'll feel like you're ina bloody sauna. Bollocks! Good thing to be first on deck the next morning just in case you leave anything behind as well...... Dinghy Man Feel ' In Grand
 
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